Home Bake Tomato Cookies

Posted by on March 5, 2014
"Assisted by Taiwan Chung Shan Medical University" (really)

“Assisted by Taiwan Chung Shan Medical University” (really)

Do you know that feeling when you go to bite into a chocolate-chip cookie, only to realize that it’s actually an oatmeal raisin cookie? Imagine that, but with a tomato cookie instead of an oatmeal raisin cookie. Did you know there were such things as tomato cookies? Neither did I until I found this box of Home Bake Tomato Cookies.  These aren’t any ordinary tomato cookies, either. They were developed with the assistance of Taiwan Chung Shan Medical University, and they claim to involve “the art of healthy cookies”.

They seem to be healthy enough, since they contain 0% added sugar, not to mention tomatoes. I mean, who would want to eat a cookie filled with chocolate chips and creme filling when they could have a miniature foil-wrapped tomato cookie instead? It’s just like giving up an ice cream sundae for a delicious dessert of celery and beets. Who wouldn’t want to make that trade?

The cookie on the package is depicted as saying “0% stress”. And of course that’s completely true. Why would anyone be stressed by sacrificing their normal cookies for these vaguely tomato-flavored monstrosit…I mean masterpieces? In fact, I think these cookies and their hint of sun-dried tomato taste are the cure for our overstressed world. As the foil wrapper on each cookie says, “even without caramel, it tastes just as sweet.” And it is a bit sweet, once you get past the hint of tomatoes.

Best of all, these cookies are “vegetarain”, as clearly shown on the box. Vegeterain! It’s raining vegetables! Well, it’s raining other things too, but…we won’t go there. Hallelujah! It’s raining vegetables! Thank you Home Bake!

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