It’s been a while since we brought you news of strange snacks and wacky weirdness, but this particular bulletin was too good to pass up. You’ve heard a lot about Tao Kae Noi Man and his delicious varieties of crispy seaweed, but we’ve recently discovered his long-lost cousin. That’s right, we’ve located the whereabouts of Tai Kae Man.
Obviously we’re not at liberty to disclose exactly where we found him, but rest assured that he was quite well hidden. Unlike his cousin Tao Kae Noi Man, Tai Kae Man doesn’t take life too seriously. While Tao Kae Noi Man often works himself into a tizzy, sometimes to the point that steam comes out of his ears, his laid-back cousin just sits around in shorts and an undershirt while consuming large quantities of a green, leafy substance. That’s not to say that these two things are necessarily related, but Tao Kae Noi Man does seem to be the more motivated member of this family.
Tao Kae Noi Man works seven days a week overseeing his vast seaweed kingdom while also inventing countless new seaweed flavors. Not only did he perfect Tom Yum Goong flavored seaweed, but he pioneered the process of coating healthy seaweed with tempura batter and deep frying it into a delicious wafer of morbid obesity. He even invented extra-crispy grilled seaweed, for when you feel guilty about eating too much tempura-coated fried seaweed.
Tai Kae Man makes soy sauce flavored seaweed. That’s all. If you want another flavor, you’re out of luck. He put the soy sauce on the seaweed, and he was wearing clothes when he did it. Can you really ask any more of him than that?
We hoped to speak with Tai Kae Man directly about his connection to the Asian seaweed dynasty, but he was unavailable for an interview. When our crew went to his one-bedroom apartment, no one would open the door. All they heard from inside was someone saying, “Tai Kae Man’s not here, man.”